Times and Seasons.

I know i said goodbye.

But there's the occasional time when i feel i need a little space of my own. God i know You are reading this.

People are made in pairs. One for another. This i totally agree.

In a recent turn of events, i found out that 2 of my frens have gotten attached. I'm happy for them, really i am, esp since one of them is my best friend in sec sch. Yet, my emotions are mixed. I can't help but feel a tinge of envy.

Why? Why is it that the whole world seems to be finding their happiness all at the same time. But it juz ain't mine. I understand You work in seasons Lord. I know now isn't the time. I know i shouldn't complain but... There is a slight sadness that i feel which i can't explain why. Is it self-pity? I hope not. I dont wanna turn into one of those desperados whom i so utterly despise. I have lost confidence in myself but i wanna put my confidence in You. That when the right one comes along at the right time, Your Holy Spirit will tell me.

"Guard my heart, oh guard my heart", You have warned me, "For out of it springs the issues of life." I will God, i will. I will try my best, and i will lean on the Holy Spirit for strength and guidance. Teach me to walk in Your ways, to be led by Your Spirit. Let my life be full of purpose Lord, Yours and not mine. Let everyday be an adventure; let every moment take my breath away. Amen.